Has there ever been a time in your life when you just couldn’t get someone off your mind? Your ex has left you or you have that crush who doesn’t feel the same way?
It was a bright day summer day where I was talking to Andrew about his life, business, and women. We were just talking and exploring new perspectives in the challenges that each of us face, but an interesting one came up for him.
Andrew had a girl that he couldn’t stop thinking about. It was weird because he is amazingly successful in business and he has a charm to him that you just got to like. Being around him makes you generally feel better.
Now after talking about business he came to the point of talking about this girl some more so I asked.
“What would it mean for you if you got this girl?”
His response was that it would mean that he would be able to attract abundance and any type of girl. So I asked him,
“If you had this girl, then you could attract any girl?”
When we went up a few levels, it became evident that this was not true, but more than anything led to two of Andrew’s highest values which are accomplishment and growth. If you think about values, those two things can be tremendous for business, but don’t always have the same effectiveness for relationships.
For Andrew I asked him, “If you have accomplishment and growth then this will allow you to be able to start having instead of chasing?”
I present this question to Andrew because he told me before that he had chased this girl away. Now I know that accomplishment and growth are just feelings, and he could give himself these feelings right now. So really he can feel those feelings and have what he wants now, but having can be an interesting paradox so I continued further.
Me: “What more is there really to have?”
Andrew: “A stable relationship with a woman I’m on the same page with. Perfect compliments of each other. Conversations and energy flow back and forth perfectly.”
Me: “Is there anything that you can really have?”
Andrew: “It’s all just borrowed.”
Me: “All the things that are in your life you have attracted to come to you. Whether it’s your phone, laptop, friends, relationship, wealth etc. but how did you attract all of those?”
Andrew gave me a list of the things that he did personally to come to where he is at which was absolutely remarkable. The journey that he took to become the person he is today is really impressive, but doing all those things isn’t what made those things come into his life. Rather it was the person he BECAME. By being able to BE this person he was able to attract new things in his life.
Andrew: “You’re right.”
And I know I had reached him. We then went on further to talk about how she first came into his life because he was the person who attracted her in his life.
His question was simply, “Did I attract her into my life because I first made that change of who I was then?”
Me: “You just might have..the universe as you said is always in a state of growth in whichever way it can. So just maybe you were ready for this lesson to take you to the next level. My guess is this girl will teach you much more about yourself, girls, and relationships.”
Andrew: “She already has. I learned those lessons. And I somehow wanted to hold onto her because she has made an amazing change in my life. So by letting go – I feel I am making room for the new ‘mentor/girl/etc’ to teach me the next lesson for my growth.”
Me: “Life will always give you what you need.”
Through this conversation with Andrew we can learn a lot of things about where his challenge was and how he can go forth with new perspectives that will likely serve him better.
There are three keys from this case study that are important to know:
1.) There is no such thing as having. You can’t have a relationship, money, clothes, or anything else. In the mind there is no such thing as possession. The mind works on an energy level where it only attracts those things and it’s temporary.
2.) You attract the things in your life by BEING. It is not a process of doing because when you do, it comes from who you are. When you become more in your life you attract more. This is true for the man looking to become attractive to more women or anyone looking to build more wealth in their lives. If you want more BE more.
- This is why most lottery winners go broke. It wasn’t who they were BEING that attracted the wealth and thus they lost it.
- It’s also why I recommend doing personal growth for you. If you BECOME someone to get money or to get a relationship, what happens when that relationship is gone? Rather you do it for you so that by BEING, you can attract those things again.
3.) Life is in a state of growth. Everything is always looking to grow more. Whether it is the trees, the animals, or the humans on the Earth we are all looking to live more, to know more, to survive more, and to grow more. When we recognize this we can also see that there are vibrational frequencies that we emit that attracts certain things and people into our lives.
Andrew went forth understanding his situation better, and with new understandings he no longer had to have this one girl. Releasing himself from the tie that he needed to be with her only allowed him to grow and accomplish more.
This led to him having amazing success in a new relationship with a new woman, but more importantly allowed him to be more confident and able to attract all types of women in his life. By BEING more, Andrew has the opportunity to attract even more into is life. I am excited to see what challenges he overcomes next and my guess is that he will learn even more from this one girl.